


President Aobama

by Snailythefan



Category: DRAMAtical Murder
Genre: Alternate Universe - Crack, Aoba the president, Aobama, Multi, hehehehe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-04-28
Updated: 2014-06-07
Packaged: 2018-01-21 04:22:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1537355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snailythefan/pseuds/Snailythefan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aoba becomes the president of the United States of America.<br/>The boyfriend squad is his secret service.</p><p>WILL AOBA BE ABLE TO HANDLE A COUNTRY BY HIMSELF???</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Elections day

It was a beautiful morning in Washington, D.C. The birds chirped, the sun was nice, and everything seemed peaceful.

Except the White House, that one was a mess. Because it was... Elections day.

After months and months of political campaigns, this would be the decisive moment between the republicans with their new candidate, an old evil man named Toue, and the new candidate of the democrats. That candidate's name was...

Aoba Seragaki. A young blue haired man of strong convictions.

That for some reason was still asleep in his home.

"Wake up, you lazy grandson!" Yelled Tae-san while kicking her grandson out of his bed. With a loud 'thud!' Aoba fell to the floor and groaned in pain. "Why do you have to do that every morning, granny?!" 

"Because you're lazier by the day! Now get moving, this is your big day!"

Aoba immediately jumped. True, it was elections day! "Oh, fuck!" The blue haired man quickly got up and ran to his closet to get his supersuit. That was actually just a normal suit, but it was Aoba's favorite because it had a little logo of a puppy in the right pocket.

After getting ready, Tae-san called his name "Aoba! The secret service is already on the front door, get your ass down here!" 

Aoba ran downstairs, and they were all already waiting for him. 

"Aoba!" Everyone said in unison when they saw the blue haired man. And that everyone were Koujaku, Noiz, Clear and Mink. That looked incredibly attractive with suits.

"This is the big day, uh" Koujaku said as he patted Aoba's back. "Soon you'll be president, who would have thought?" 

"I'll buy everyone a pizza when you win" said Noiz with a grin on his face, and then he whispered "except Koujaku because he's a dick"

"Goddamn rich kid" said Mink. "You'll win for sure" he continued.

"Aoba-san, I'm so excited to see you win! Polls are in our favor!" Said Clear as he got a folded sheet from his pocket. It was a little graphic with two bars. A blue one and a red one. The blue one was over the other by a huge gap. 

"See? The blue one is yours, Aoba-san. And the other one is of the evil man with a little dick" said Clear with a huge smile on his face.

"U-Uh. Okay, that's good, I think"

"Enough fooling around, people. Let's get moving!" Said Koujaku.

"Hey hold on, where's Ren?" Asked Aoba.

"He's waiting for us in the White House" said Mink as he adjusted his tie for no reason but to look professional (and slightly more like a hot dad). "He wanted to make sure the place was safe for you"

"Aww" said Aoba. Ren was always thinking of him.

"Whatever, let's go" said Noiz. 

Outside the Seragaki's residence was a huge black jeep, that 6 or more people could ride. Just like Aoba. But the point is that it had also a cup holder, and that made that jeep one fine ass vehicle.

While Aoba walked towards the jeep, Clear speaked through a walkie talkie. "Blue butt is leaving the nest, I repeat, blue butt is leaving the nest, over"

Aoba still couldn't believe the code name they had given him. But hey, everyone had code names. He couldn't complain.

Over the walkie talkie, Ren's voice was heard. "Copied, metal dildo. Furry lover here, waiting for blue butt's arrival. Over" 

Koujaku and Noiz got on the front seats of the jeep, while Clear and Mink sat on the back seats with Aoba. Noiz was going to drive this time, much to Koujaku's annoyance. But before leaving, Noiz grabbed his walkie talkie and speaked through it. "Furry lover, get me a pizza with double cheese. Over" 

Everyone on the vehicle sighed.

"What's with you and pizza?!" Asked Aoba from the back seat.

Ren spoke "What? Why do you want a pizza right now, memedong? Over"

Noiz laughed. "I didn't. I just wanted to hear my code name again. Over" He said with a smug ass grin on his face.

Everyone sighed even louder this time.

"You motherfucker" said Mink in an angry tone.

Finally Noiz started the engine, and they blasted off spice girls songs while they drove to the White House.

 

\----

 

A lot of people were reunited in the front of the White House, so they had to use the secret entrance nobody knew about. 

When they finally got off the jeep, everyone kept humming 'if you wanna be my lover'.

Koujaku grabbed his walkie talkie "Furry lover, do you copy? The blue butt is in, the blue butt is in. Over" 

"Who's this? Over" said Ren

"... You know who I am! Over" said Koujaku.

"Code name, please. Over" 

Noiz was snickering behind Koujaku.

"...F-Fine! ...This is sassy gay hairdresser. Over"

"Copied, sassy gay hairdresser. Take blue butt to the main hall. Over"

Noiz was laughing his ass off while Aoba just sighed. "Who even choose these code names?" Asked Koujaku under his breath.

"That would be rich boy over there" said Mink, pointing at Noiz that was still laughing.

"Whatever, can we move on? It's a important day, gentlemen!" Said Aoba as he walked towards the main hall. His personal bodyguards followed him.

"You're such a dick, asshole" said Koujaku to Noiz.

"The feeling is mutual, honey" said Noiz as he blowed a kiss to the other.

 

-

 

Ren received them at the main hall. A lot of other politicians where there, all blabbering about politics and stuff. They were all very professional, so professional that Mink felt the need to adjust his tie again so he could look as professional as them (and also to keep his hot dad image).

"Aoba" said Ren as he walked towards te blue haired man and hugged him. "I'm so happy, this is your big day" he said.

"Aww, thank you, Ren. Everyone seems pretty excited today" said Aoba as he looked around.

But from the corner of his eye he saw the disgusting little man that was his rival candidate: Toue.

"That fucker is already here" said Mink in a whisper.

Behind the republican there were his body guards, two tall albino males.

"Oh shit" said Clear. "My brothers are here too"

As soon as he said that, both of the albino males turned around and stared at Clear with huge grins. Alpha waved at Clear and Alpha2 flipped him the bird. Nice.

"Don't worry about them" said Aoba. "We won't lose"

 

-

 

The tension was so thick inside the White House, that if it had been a dick, Noiz would have made a dildo out of it and pleasured himself with it. It was just that thick.

Minutes passed and elections kept going. Toue looked calm as ever. But Aoba was getting even more nervous by each minute that passed.

"Aoba? You don't look so well..." said Koujaku in a worried tone.

"Yeah, I'm just... Ugh, I don't feel good-" and then Aoba puked all over Koujaku's pants. 'Holy fucking shit, Aoba. Well done on elections day' mentally scolded himself the blue haired man.

Everyone turned to look at the scene. It was extremely embarrassing. However Noiz was laughing behind them. "Jesus fuck" said Mink as he massaged his temples.

After he was done, Koujaku with a blank expression leaved the room saying "I'll go change"

Clear came up to Aoba with a Kleenex, cleaned his face and handed him some pills. "For your nerves, Aoba-san" Clear smiled to him.

"T-Thanks" then Aoba swallowed the pills immediately. Without water because Aoba Seragaki was one fearless motherfucker. 

 

-

 

Finally, it was the moment of truth. A long time had passed, elections were over, and because of magical time skips, they were about to announce the winner that was going to be the next president of the United States of America.

Both candidates awaited the results.

On the podium, a white old man was about to read the results.

"And this year, the winner and new president will be..."

Toue and Aoba swallowed hard.

"... Will be..." Continued the old man.

Tae-san was holding her breath while watching the televised transmission of the results. She was wearing a shirt that had printed in it "VOTE FOR AOBA OR YOU'RE STRAIGHT".

"...Will be..." Somewhere far, far, far away, Aoba's parents where proud of him.

"...Will be..." Mizuki was listening to the radio. He had to stop his making out with Ryuuhou in order to pay attention to the results. "Jeez, Aoba-kun is such a cockblock" said Ryuuhou, upset that his tongue was no longer inside the mouth of the other. "Shut up for a minute, would ya? Aoba will be president!"

"Whatever" Ryuuhou laid down on the couch, still with a hard-on. 

"Aoba Seragaki, with 89% of the people's votes, is the new president of the United States of America!"

The crowd went wild.


	2. Presidential PLOT TWIST

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba is celebrating that he is now president of the United States of America!  
> BUT WHAT COULD POSSIBLY RUIN THAT???

Everyone outside the White House kept screaming Aoba's name over and over again. And inside the White House was an extreme showdown of politicians that for some reason kept fighting even if the result was clear now.

Aoba Seragaki was president of the United States of America.

'Oh my god! I'm president, I'm the president!' Aoba's thoughts were messy, he could barely believe this was happening. Especially because he wasn't even American and technically his candidature was impossible, but here he was! Aoba Seragaki, proud new president.

Toue was in shock, the results were too much for him and he fell to the ground after a gasp. "Master!" Exclaimed the Alphas. But it was too late.

Toue had a cardiac arrest.

"You know he dead" whispered Noiz.

"Goddamnit memedong, this is hardly the time" whispered Koujaku.

"Toue is dead!" finally said Alpha as he stopped slapping the corpse in order to reanimate it.

The crowd was alarmed!

But not enough to give a single fuck, so everyone started to exit the main hall and going home to call it a day.

 

 

\--

 

 

"Alright sir, I'll repeat your order to confirm. You want three family size pizzas, a meat special, a vegetarian and also one with extra cheese, is that correct?"

"Yeah"

"Alright. We'll be delivering soon" the man on the other side said before hanging up.

"Fuck yeah. Pizza's coming guys!" Noiz said out loud and everyone sitting on the table cheered.

After Aoba won the presidency, everyone gathered on the White House's basement to celebrate the event, even though that everyone were just Aoba, Tae and all five boyfriends of the president.

"Oh Aoba, I'm so proud of you!" Said Tae smiling to her grandson.

"Hehe, thanks granny"

"So, can someone explain me why we are celebrating on the basement instead of, you know, a restaurant or something like normal people?!" finally asked Koujaku.

"For Aoba-san's safety, of course!" Said Clear as he popped open a bottle of champagne and poured some to the others "Now that he's president we must keep him safe until Toue's people calm down"

"Also we didn't have enough _funds_ to pay for a fancy restaurant" added Ren.

"W-what?! What happened to those funds?!" asked an alarmed Koujaku.

"Uh, you know, we bought extremely important stuff, for uh, _Aoba's candidature_. Yeah. That's all you need to know" said Noiz with a blank expression, trying to sound as convincing as he could, but also remembering the wild party they had thrown a week before the elections, to which of course, Koujaku had not been invited. _Or even informed of_.

"I thought we had used those funds for a huge part-" just as Clear was about to spill the beans, Mink quickly shoved in his mouth one of the donuts Tae had brought with her.

"Mmmph!" Clear tried to resist but in the end he finally eat the donut. "Wow, delicious as always!" he said.

"Of course they are delicious, you full metal idiot! I made them myself" said Tae with pride.

Noiz gave Mink a look that said 'you just saved my ass' and Mink just gave a little nod.

After all, he didn't want anyone to know about that party in which for some bizarre reason he was convinced to do karaoke. Oh, the shame.

The fact that he had singed the sailor moon opening while being drunk was something he was taking to the grave.

He was so ashamed, he was sure even his ancestors could feel it. He could almost hear them said "God fucking damnit Mink, we didn't died just so you could ruin the sailor moon opening with your hot bara voice".

Thankfully, they were pretty dead and not alive to feel the incredible shame Mink had felt.

 

 

\----

 

 

After the pizza arrived, everyone started eating and sharing jokes between them. But most of the time it was just Noiz talking about Internet memes and making fun of Koujaku.

"-and then he said 'iiyo' in his sleep!" as soon as Noiz finished telling his anecdote, everyone started laughing.

"H-Hey! Nobody was supposed to know about that, you damn brat!" said an embarrassed Koujaku.

"Whatever, old man" Noiz grabbed another slice of pizza and took a bite.

Suddenly a buzzing sound could be heard.

"Uh" everyone started to look around, trying to find the source of the sound.

"Alright" started Mink "who the fuck brought a vibrator down here?"

Everyone slowly turned around to stare at Noiz.

"I did not bring a vibrator with me _this time_ " he said.

So everyone turned around to stare at Clear.

"Uh?! Why is everyone looking at me?" asked the robot boy in a whiney tone.

"Clear, you're the only one here which dick can vibrate" Aoba said a little embarrassed.

"My dick is not vibrating right now! I swear!"

The buzzing sound was louder this time, and it was clear that the source wasn't inside anyone pants.

Suddenly, one of the walls of the basement exploded, thing that surprised everyone. Then someone threw inside the basement cans that released a mysterious gas!

"Watch out, mister president!" Ren shouted but it was too late, the gas was starting to have effects on everyone.

"What the fuck is going on?!" asked Aoba while he coughed.

"Clear, where the fuck is your gas mask?!" Asked Mink, coughing.

"Back in Japan!"

"Clear, you useless homosexual" said Koujaku before coughing a few more times and falling to the ground.

"Oh fuck! Is he fucking dead? Are we gonna die?!" Noiz was starting to get worried. He did not regain his sense of pain just to die in a basement, hell fucking no.

Clear fell to the ground too, and started to make ' _snore, snore, snore_ ' noises.

"Clear, what the fuck?! Get up, you're a goddamn robot, the fucking gas should not... Affect... You..." Noiz fell to the ground too, the sleeping gas finally getting to him. He was followed by the others, one by one.

And then everyone in the basement was sleeping like a baby.

Wearing gas masks, two shady figures entered the basement.

"Infiltration mission: success!" said the first one.

"A job well done" said the other.

"Alright, now where is Aoba-kun?" looking around, they found the blue haired man sleeping face right into Ren's crotch.

"Wow"

"Take a picture"

Taking out his phone, one of the gas masked men took a few pics. "lmao best pic ever"

"Did you just said ' _lmao_ ' out loud?"

"Whatever, let's just take him and get out of here"

They both dragged Aoba into the hole in the wall they had made, and before escaping, one of them returned to steal what was left of the extra cheese pizza.

"What the fuck? We're kidnapping a president; we didn't come here to eat"

" _It's an extra cheese pizza!_ "

"Whatever"

And just like that, they were gone, taking the United States of America's president with them.

 

 

\----

 

 

"...Ugh..." When Koujaku woke up, he was in a hospital bed. By his side he noticed the other members of the secret service were too. Even Clear, that still kept up his ' _snore, snore, snore_ ' act. Fucking useless homosexual robot junk, thought Koujaku.

A nurse quickly came to him "S-Sir! Are you alright? Do you remember anything?"

Koujaku couldn't focus, his head was killing him and he still felt dizzy.

"...Where's A-Aoba?" Was the first thing he asked.

"He was abducted by the republicans!" said the nurse that knew absolutely nothing about not being blunt with patients that might get shocked by totally unexpected revelations.

"What the fuck...?" asked Noiz from a side bed, he had apparently just regained consciousness.

"Aoba-san is in the hands of the purely evil republicans?! That can't be possible!" quickly, Clear finally stopped pretending to be sleeping like a normal human affected by the sleeping gas, and opened his eyes at the totally unexpected revelation.

"Don't give me that bullshit when you pretended to be asleep!" Mink had finally woken up and was clearly irritable without his morning coffee and of course, without Aoba's good morning kiss. But of course, anyone would be irritable after being knocked out by sleeping gas. However Mink truly needed his morning coffee at the moment, two cream one sugar.

"Wait... Wasn't Tae-san with us...?" asked Koujaku after processing all that was happening at the moment.

"...And where's furry lover?" Asked Noiz while he detached himself from the intravenous thingy in a really violent way just like in action movies, because Noiz was one _fearless motherfucker._

...Except he screamed in pain with a high pitched voice afterwards because he had forgotten he, _in fact_ , could feel pain again.

"W-WHY DID I NEEDED THAT INTRAVENOUS THING ANYWAY?!" He screamed at the nurse.

"Well, that's because-"

Just before Noiz could get the answer to the question that would haunt him for years, the door to the hospital's room opened with a slam, and Ren, with Tae-san in his back, rushed in with a confused expression.

Tae-san seemed to be completely fine, much to all the boyfriends relief, but their relieved thoughts were quickly cut by Tae's voice.

"YOU MOTHERFUCKERS!!! WHERE THE FUCKING HELL IS _MY GRANDSON???_ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promised i would up8 this fic after my finals so here we are.
> 
> SUDDEN PLOT TWIST, who even saw that coming.
> 
> TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR THE THRILLING CONCLUSION.

**Author's Note:**

> I literally woke up and said "I'm finally gonna write that Aobama AU me and Colby used to talk about" ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
> 
> Shout out to Kuro for, again, being the Beta-reader (even for this kind of shit) \\(⊙▽⊙)/


End file.
